Some memories of our family – Flashes from the forgotten years

Family: Family has different meanings for different people. In the good old days, joint families were very common and normally ten to fifteen members of the family lived together. In the present context, family is expected to include husband, wife and one or two children. Times have changed and the concept of families has undergone a lot of change from time to time. Whatever be the times and whatever be the number of persons included in the family, all members of the family are bound together by invisible threads of love, affection and concern for each other. Normally, every member of the family works for each other and for the overall growth, development, safety, security and happiness of the family. There is no written constitution for the day to day working of the families, but, the system works and has been working, since times immemorial.

Memories: Memory is a tricky subject. Memories are like green valleys and deep forests. Memories are an unlimited source of happiness and inspiration to the people and to their families and friends. We never bother to see, what is stored in our memories. From the day, we are born, the images of what we do, what we see, what we listen and what we feel are etched in our memory. We carry a small chip in our head, which stores all sounds and photographic images of all our activities, at all times throughout our lives. Our interactions with our family, friends and all others, with whom we live, play or work are faithfully recorded in our memory. There is no man-made storage device, which can handle that vast array of all types of sounds and images. Whenever, we think about any of the past incidents or associations, we get photographic flashes of all that had happened at that time. Fortunately, none of the sounds, feelings or images stored in our memories can be modified or erased by methods known to man.

Our roots: The roots of our family begin with our forefathers, whom we have not seen and nothing is known about their life, toils and tears. However, we always have a hankering to know about our roots and the life and times of our forefathers and to draw some reinforcement and inspiration from their struggles and achievements. Our family had its roots in Jisola, a small village in Muzaffarnagar District of U.P. The family were zamindars of the area and had a magnificent building in the village for living and were known in the village as mahalwalas.

Our Family: Our family history begins with our grandfather Laxmi Sahai, who was working on a professional engineering job in western Punjab. He used to visit us at Bundi in Rajasthan, in the early thirties. Our grandmother had died earlier and therefore, he was all alone, while on works and whenever he visited us. He was very gentle and affectionate by nature and left an indelible mark on us, after every visit. He died at Bundi sometimes in the year 1935. Our father Brijbhushan Lal was the only son of our grandfather. Rai Sahib Kanahiya Lal, Kundan Lal, Bishambhar Lal, Basant Lal, Ratan Lal and our father Brijbhushan Lal were six cousins of our family. Rai Sahib Kanahiya Lal was the eldest and our father Brijbhushan Lal was the youngest. They were living in different states, in different cities and had families of their own, but, they were bound together, intimately, with family ties of love, affection and concern for each other. All invitations for festive occasions and marriage ceremonies of their children used to be issued jointly in the names of all six cousins and they happily shared the joys, trials and tribulations of the family during those times.

Some memories of our family: Some memories of our family presents, some glimpses into the life and times of our family during those forgotton years. These are not biographical sketches. These are personal reminiscences of the life and times of our elders, who were a tremendous source of inspiration and support to us, during our formative years and the life and times of our children, who turned all stones for making our life happy and comfortable during our passage through life. The world has changed beyond recognition since then, particularly during the last fifty to sixty years. Naturally, the family ties have also gone through a lot of strain and all types of new relationships have cropped up. However, the present generation is sharp and intelligent and in spite of all their involvements and diversions in the fast paced world, they have managed to maintain a deep regard and attachment for their traditional family ties.

Following chapters discuss these memories in detail: